The relief. Something I was dreading, that discussion where I have to defend my stance on my own pornographic fiction. It is over now and I survived although I am a little shaken. Not as bad as it could be. Not as bad as being naked on the stage at a writers festival with Dworkin in the audience. That is the ultimate moment of debasement. Someone entirely dedicated to a hatred of the pleasure I have spent my life on, looking at my tired old cunt and saggy tits.
On this day the jacket of my new book was released into the world here http://textpublishing.com.au/books-and-authors/book/triptych/
On this day I survived the first round of my own defense. I am exhausted. I retire to the couch where I treat myself to some furtive masturbation under the cover of a throw. It is not the worst day but it is a day that has played havoc with my relationship to the work.
Lets see what tomorrow brings.
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