Sunday, January 25, 2009

Is Philip Seymour Hoffman Good in bed?

Google should have the answer to everything. When I Google 'what should I do today?' it comes back with a hundred answers, many of them a possibility. And yet when I Google 'Is Philip Seymour Hoffman good in bed?' it comes back with nothing too interesting. If you Google 'Is Brad Pitt good in bed' it comes back with a whole list of gossip and hearsay. So I want to say to the world: "YOU PEOPLE HAVE NO IMAGINATION AND AS A RESULT YOU WILL MISS OUT!"

The truth is it is quite likely that Brad Pitt is boring in the sack. Why would someone who gets voted 'cutest' and 'hottest' have to work at all?

I watch Philip Seymour Hoffman perform and each time I notice the sensual way that the man moves, his full lips, his generous smile, the eyes that seem confidant and humble all at once. His hands are particularly moving. They move languidly. They touch, and they look like they are truly feeling whatever they are placed on. In my imagination I place them on me. It has been ages since I have had such a crush on an actor. I have settled on Juliette Binoche because of her intelligent eyes and her genuine smile, and of course the accent. I am a sucker for a good French accent. But really, I can't see Hoffman without imagining him curled up beside me on cool white sheets.

So now when you Google 'Is Philip Seymour Hoffman good in bed' there will be one answer and it will be from me and the answer will be; yes, I imagine he is exceptional in bed and if it weren't for my perfect, gorgeous, wonderful husband, I would make some serious attempt to prove to you all that this answer is correct.

3 comments:

LiteraryMinded said...

See 'Before the Devil Knows You're Dead'. The opening scene is Pheymour f**king Marisa Tomei, and it goes on for ages! It looks real.
:-)

Krissy Kneen said...

I did see the first part of that film. Very satisfying. Didn't bother with the rest of the film yet though. Had to go have a cold shower.

Red Fox said...

Ahhh...Philip Seymour Hoffman. I think "good in bed" might barely cover it. Yes hands, mouth, eyes, all beautiful. But that voice! A just roused from sleep, tousled, warm, velvety voice. Who could resist such a voice? In an age when we seem more obsessed with the "perfect" human form his scene with Marissa Tomei at the beginning of the 'Before the Devil Knows You're Dead' was wonderfully antithetical and erotic. I didn't bother having a cold shower; I did something altogether different.